Thursday, January 26, 2012

Book Reivew Hiaku: Bossypants

Book Review Haiku: Bossypants by Tina Fey



Why is it so great
I can't seem to figure it out
I love Liz Lemon



Don't get me wrong, Bossypants was a good book. I really enjoyed it. The honeymoon cruise story was hilarious. What I can't seem to pinpoint is-what about this book put it on almost everyone's Book of 2011 lists? If someone out there has read this book and can answer my question, please do. 

Thursday, January 19, 2012

They Spouted...About ME!

One of the best features in my local newspaper, The Cape May County Herald, is the Spout Off. The Spout Off gives a platform for crotchety old people, allowing them to voice their distaste for the community behind the mask of anonymity. 

Arguably, it is THE BEST feature in the entire paper. Well, next to The Grid.

Let me just digress for a moment. The Grid is glorious. It is the go to guide for Cape May County. During the height of the summer, it is a two page spread listing each bar and its nightly entertainment. I always say the saddest day of the year is when The Grid down grades to a quarter page in the off season.

But back to the Spout Off. To get an idea of what the Spout Off is, here are few of last week's complaints:

North Wildwood - Many of us locals are resentful of the Shoobies who are trying to take over over town. That is why many of us proudly display Dallas Cowboys or Pittsburgh Steelers decals on the back windows of our pickup trucks. I would rather support a team from anywhere other than Philly.
What this Spouter seems to forget, that without the Shoobies (Shoobie = a tourist) their City would be nothing. The Wildwoods were built by these Shoobies. Get over it.
Court House - Hey Dennis Township, enough with the ATV spouts already. Every week it's the same thing. Can't you start a new topic?
Those crazy Dennis Township people really hate ATVs! One week someone actually complained that the noise was damaging her newborn's ears. While the baby was sleeping. Inside the house. Away from the ATVs.
Wildwood - Mayor Troiano wants to fight property assessments that were lower and Commissioner Bryon wants to do a city wide reassessment which will lower all property assessments. Do they talk to each other?
Let's set the record straight. Mayor Troiano was thrown out of office then re-elected the following election. They have no right to complain. 

So imagine my chagrin when The Captain read this aloud:




Holy crap, that is about me! ME! Someone is spouting about me. How could that be? I am a good neighbor. I am thoughtful when shopping in my local stores. I always put my groceries back in their proper place! I always hold the door open for these crotchety old people when entering and exiting Wawa. How could this be about me?

BINGO! Literally, it's about the time I played Bingo with my friends M and S.  

After our plans to play "cranes" at Gateway 26 fell through (I didn't get the memo that it would only be open on weekends) and with nothing else open, we decided to hit the local fire hall for its weekly Bingo Night.

It was in Game 3 that things got nasty and the true color of my neighbors came to the surface. All of a sudden M yelled Bingo! We were ecstatic-laughing and cheering. During our little celebration, the elderly woman in a visor/fanny pack combo turns to us and says "YEAH! Well I gots Bingo too hunny!"  

We didn't know how to response to that remark. The three of us looked at each other with that "WTF lady" look, went about our celebration, and collected our fifty-dollar pay out!



'Twenty dolla bills, ya'll!'

We didn't realize, until we saw the Spout above (a month later), that she meant she had Bingo on that hand. That's too bad. Guess she should have focused her energy on getting the attention of the organizers rather than pushing her negative vibes on to us. 

Villas - To the anonymous Bingo Spouter back in November: See you next week! GAME. ON. Bitches! 

Your Daily Barista

Friday, January 6, 2012

2011 GoodReads Book Challenge

Well I have decided to make a concentrated effort to blog again. Really for no other reason than to give me something to do.

Allow me to fill you in in what has been going on over the past year...um...let's see... yeah I got nothing. Since I am still out of (full-time or for that matter steady part time) work, life has become a cycle of bad daytime TV and pajamas changes.  Not to mention, Words with Friends battles with who ever challenges me (threepmcoffee)

With that being said, let us jump back in. Right into the deep end. Without even testing the water.

I am member of the social networking site for book nerds, Goodreads.com.  Goodreads wants you to challenge yourself to read as many books as you can in 365 days. Last year I had challenged myself to read 20 books. I was pumped for it too. All of the elements aligned: I was out of work, I lived by the beach, and I was given a Nook for my 30th birthday.

Here is a run down of what I read:



I know what you are thinking "wow that is an eclectic group you got there!" And you are right. I like all types of stories, genres, and writers. Not all of my choices were home runs (*cough* Interpretation of a Murder *cough, cough* A Desirable Residence) but there were a few that I really loved.

Columbine by Dave Cullen was heart-wrenchingly detailed.  I learned that a former drug addict and high school drop out Duff McKagan is an amazing writer (It's So Easy...) The Help was the story I didn't want to end. And Tucker Maxx makes me happy that I am not single (I Hope They Serve Beer In Hell. I wasn't crazy about his follow up Assholes Finish First.) 

The last two book pictured above are cropped for a reason. The first is The Count of Monte Cristo. I made the mistake of asking The Captain what classic novel he would recommend. That book was crap. I got as far as the Count meeting the children of the guys that put him jail (which I didn't realize were their kids.) To borrow a line from my favorite stage play Amadeus, "Too many notes." Seriously.  I mean it was ridiculous. 

With my deadline looming and being stuck on this piece of crap for weeks, I decided to bail and start The Night Circus. I was so happy I did. I LOVED that story. It was so visually stunning. I would love to see it on the big screen but lets be honest Hollywood would just destroy it. Baz Luhrmann would come in and make it a shitty Moulin Rouge-esque musical. BLAH.

Sadly, I did not finish it before my deadline. In the end I only read eighteen books. Technically, eighteen and three quarters.

How many books did you read in 2011? Have any recommendations for my 2012 challenge?

YDB

P.S. - I have challenged myself to read 25 (eek!!) books in 2012. Tina Fey's Bossypants is the first one to the plate.